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How to talk to Obama supporters

Following my last guide, “A Guide to Obama Supporters”, I decided to write a guide on the delicate art of communicating with Obama supporters. And it IS an art. Obama supporters are remarkably predictable in their interactions and as such can be manipulated easily in creative ways. There are three principles to understand:

Overwhelm:

Whenever you’ve made a good point about the failings of Obama, the Obama supporter will invariably demand that you talk about something else, and chastize you for having brought it up. For example:

You: Obama shouldn’t have have taken Rezko’s money.

Obama supporter: You’re just attacking Obama’s character because you can’t talk about issues! YES WE CAN!

Or:

You: Obama’s foreign policy is very naive. Doesn’t he know it’s silly to negotiate without preparation and preconditions?

Obama Supporter: You’re just attacking him on issues because your candidate has less character! Obama is a clean politician! YES WE CAN!

The solution to this is to overwhelm the Obama supporter with multiple facets of Obama’s flaws. Try to talk about Obama’s character and the issues both at once. For example:

You: If Obama can’t stand up to the anti-Americanism in his own pastor and wife, how can he be expected to stand up for America abroad? That sort of character doesn’t make for sound foreign policy.

Obama Supporter: You’re just talking about Obama’s character and the issues because you can’t talk about……um…..YES WE CAN!

Mockery:

In most instances, the Obama supporter will not want to discuss any issues with you, but rather to personally attack you and make threats. It is ill advised to try and discuss issues with these types, you’ll just waste effort. The best approach to this, is to mock them playfully while remaining above the level of their attacks. You should smile as you do so and laugh about it with friends later.

Example 1: The Yeswecan.

Obama Supporter: Our economy is exploding we’re all gonna die and racism is getting worse and there are Republicans under my bed and….

You: Sounds like you need to change your attitude into something more hopeful.

Example 2: The O’Latte:

Obama Supporter: Only idiots don’t vote for Obama! YES WE CAN!

You: Wait a sec, but I thought you said you were voting for him?

Example 3: The Obamaton AKA Obamabot

Obama Supporter: OMFG U R SUX U F***ING RUHS LIMBAH BUSH HITLERY! YES WE CAN!

You: Hey, why all the hate? Doesn’t your candidate stand for unity and mutual respect? Oh wait, maybe you don’t support him? OMFG RACIST! YES WE CAN!

Obama Supporter: ??????? YES WE CAN!

You: YES WE CAN!

Obama Supporter: YES WE CAN!

You: By the way, Obama sucks.

(repeat)

(The Obamelites don’t “mingle” with normal people, Obombers don’t speak, and O’Zombies are well, basically zombies. For these reasons, you’ll only likely talk to the three types above.)

Reverse:

Oftentimes, Obama supporters will accuse you of being a racist. There is only one solution to this: use their same logic and accuse them of being more racist. Obama supporters assume that if you aren’t voting for Obama, you must hate black people. But, Obama is half-white. So, accuse them in turn of being unable to support a full-black candidate because of racism. Pick a black candidate you think will work for this. I generally use Condi because she’s both black and a woman. Thus, I can add the sexism charge too. For example:

Obama Supporter: You aren’t voting for Obama? RACIST! RACIST! RACIST! YES WE CAN!

You: Oh, so you’re voting for Obama? What, do you just hate full-black people so much you could only bring yourself to vote for someone that was half-white? Wow. I’m campaigning to elect Condi Rice. Not only is she black, but she’s also a woman, and she’s not even running for president. Obama got delegates in Michigan he didn’t earn, why not Condi?

When having such conversations, it is important to remember to have fun. As a general rule, Obama supporters are really, really, really, really, dumb and dumb people have a way of frustrating normal people. Don’t let them frustrate you. Have fun.

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Categories: Obama Supporters
  1. Alack
    June 7, 2008 at 7:30 pm

    Quite good indeed.

  2. noname
    June 8, 2008 at 12:13 pm

    Good one again. But not as as good as type of osama supporters.

  3. Florida Girl
    June 8, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    I have independently come up with these same ideas, except for the Condi Rice one, which is really, really good. My favorite is to take the high road while you are called stupid, moronic, racist, etc.. They really cannot deal with that. One really bright poster on RCP actually had a Obama supporter attempting to intellectually support Bros before Hos. It was amazing.

  4. Greg
    June 8, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    Very, very funny and effective. Maybe we can put out a pamphlet with pictures..like the Jehova’s Witnesses

  5. Obama Supporter
    June 8, 2008 at 1:18 pm

    Except most Obama supporters are well-educated and would easily be able to respond to this elementary bullshit. I’m sorry, but this is not a good guide for talking to Obama supporters at all and more of self-indulgent bullshit than anything else.

  6. fredshelm
    June 8, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    Obama Supporter says:

    Except most Obama supporters are well-educated and would easily be able to respond to this elementary bullshit. I’m sorry, but this is not a good guide for talking to Obama supporters at all and more of self-indulgent bullshit than anything else.

    From the official Guide to Obama Supporters:

    O’lattes: To understand an O’latte, you must put yourself in his shoes. An O’latte believes he’s better than everyone else. And while he enjoys sneering at poor people and chastizing those who dare to question his supreme intellect, he is somewhat depressed. “Why can’t the world be more like me?” he wonders. Then, like a ray of sunlight, Obama appears. “Hey, he thinks he’s better than everyone else just like me!” exclaims the O’latte. Finally, the O’latte finds hope, knowing he is no longer alone in his narcissism. O’lattes are not dangerous, but nevertheless extremely annoying.

  7. Liberty
    June 8, 2008 at 1:34 pm

    hussein obama is just the latest version of jim jones with some political corruption thrown in for effect. Its better to let his supporters drink the poison and go after independents.

  8. jbjd
    June 8, 2008 at 2:49 pm

    My 15-year-old son and I play a game of spinning everything Obama. For example, remember after Senator Kennedy endorsed her opponent, Senator Clinton approached him on the floor of the House, on the occasion of the President’s State of the Union? And as she reached out her hand Senator Obama, standing next to Mr. Kennedy, appeared to twist his body so that his back was to her? I described this brouhaha to my son, pointing out some interpreted his move as a sign of disrespect. He listened and went into his room. A few minutes he returned with the spin. ‘Mom, Senator Obama wasn’t dissing Senator Clinton. He was just taking a lesson from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.; he was turning the other cheek.’ (At first, my son – he’s black – supported Senator Obama but once he began listening to his speeches he changed his mind. ‘Mom, he isn’t saying anything!’ That’s my boy!)

  9. fredshelm
    June 8, 2008 at 2:52 pm

    Jbjd, you’ve got a smart kid.

  10. Louietheloser
    June 8, 2008 at 5:11 pm

    Grow up people. This is 2008. Being a racist and a fool died out years ago. Time to move on.

  11. fredshelm
    June 8, 2008 at 6:14 pm

    The aptly named Louietheloser says:

    Grow up people. This is 2008. Being a racist and a fool died out years ago. Time to move on.

    How to talk to Obama supporters says:

    Oh, so you’re voting for Obama? What, do you just hate full-black people so much you could only bring yourself to vote for someone that was half-white? Wow. I’m campaigning to elect Condi Rice. Not only is she black, but she’s also a woman, and she’s not even running for president. Obama got delegates in Michigan he didn’t earn, why not Condi?

  12. June 8, 2008 at 6:27 pm

    “Obama Supporter: OMFG U R SUX U F***ING RUHS LIMBAH BUSH HITLERY! YES WE CAN!

    You: Hey, why all the hate? Doesn’t your candidate stand for unity and mutual respect? Oh wait, maybe you don’t support him? OMFG RACIST! YES WE CAN!”

    I’ve come across this many times. It also, oddly enough, often coincides with those who talk about how good Obama makes them feel deep down inside. Yet those warm fuzzies don’t extend to those who disagree. They are quick to label others (Hillary, Bush) as “evil.” I always ask why they can label people as evil, but when G.W. does it he is being too simplistic and black-and-white. 😉

  13. Jan
    June 9, 2008 at 4:01 am

    The original post is excellent.
    But the responses from fredshelm to Obamaniacs… word for word, straight from the Guide itself… are PRICELESS!
    Thanks.

  14. Quinn - Houston, Texas
    June 9, 2008 at 7:26 am

    Where do I start?

    You’re an idiot. I am an Obama supporter and there is nothing racist about NOT supporting Obama. We Obama supporters are too educated to think in such simple terms. Remember?

    Could it be that people tend to jump to the conclusion that they’re racist all on their own? I know too many women who hate men because they think they’re fat. The problem is no man has ever called them fat. They just assume that men think they’re fat. Some of you Obama haters have the same complex because you know you don’t have a good reason to hate him so much.

  15. June 9, 2008 at 7:56 am

    I wrote a piece about Obama’s true believers myself and I agree that there are several standard responses of Obama supporters. The bottom line is that in my opinion, you don’t talk to them at all, because it is not an intelligent conversation. No matter the facts or logic, they believe that Obama can walk on water. There are no good points to make because they are like cult members transfixed by him. Here is my piece…

    http://theeprovocateur.blogspot.com/2008/06/cult-of-barack-obama.html

  16. fredshelm
    June 9, 2008 at 8:15 am

    The aptly named Louietheloser says:

    Grow up people. This is 2008. Being a racist and a fool died out years ago. Time to move on.

    Quinn – Houston, Texas says:

    Where do I start?

    You’re an idiot. I am an Obama supporter and there is nothing racist about NOT supporting Obama. We Obama supporters are too educated to think in such simple terms. Remember?

    Could it be that people tend to jump to the conclusion that they’re racist all on their own? I know too many women who hate men because they think they’re fat. The problem is no man has ever called them fat. They just assume that men think they’re fat. Some of you Obama haters have the same complex because you know you don’t have a good reason to hate him so much.

    That’s hilarious. First an Obama supporter accuses us of being racist. Then another Obama supporter chimes in and accuses us of imagining being accused of being racist. Quinn, next time, before you call someone an idiot, READ FIRST! And you guys wonder why we poke fun at you………

  17. Kerri H.
    September 17, 2008 at 3:17 pm

  18. Jacob
    September 17, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    Obama is obviously using the race card because he has a lot to gain and nothing to lose.

    Think about it, black people want racism to exist because they can use it as an excuse for everything, and because blacks are the biggest beneficiaries if racism exists.

    How exactly would white people benefit from racism?

    … just imagine if there was a White History Month. I believe that Black History Month just causes more segregation and racism. it should be changed into American History Month.

    Blacks tend to be more racist because they can get away with it easier. They like to preach their 200 year old slave propaganda to take advantage of people.

    And remember it was Obama’s church and racist pastor for over 20 years who claimed “God DAMN America!!!”.

    Are you automatically racist if you disagree with a black person??

  19. Mark
    December 26, 2008 at 8:47 pm

    Lol, you are like a freakin`god on writing this kinda stuff, congrats 🙂 And ya btw, Obama supporters, at least like 99 % are morons. 😉

  20. patricia pereira pinto
    March 16, 2009 at 7:58 am

    I heard Obama wants to get a dog for his kids. he thought of a portuguese “cão de água”, instead of uying, can’t you adopt a dog, there are portuguese “cães de água” for free, dogs that once had a house. visit http://www.adopta-me.org

  21. Changeling
    October 20, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    Lmao. I know there are some intelligent Obama supporters. But really. You can tell the guy’s being incredibly playful in this article. I mean for halloween last year people wore t shirts with coins claiming vote for CHANGE…that was clever but then you get the whole YES WE CAN Crap and you have to shake your head.

  1. June 17, 2008 at 8:41 pm

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